Why does he watch the same video over and over?
Q: I have a 5 year old twin boy (his brother is "typical") who is non-verbal, but does better than average in the eye contact and "changes in daily life" areas.
Here are my questions; if you can't answer them or even give your opinion, I totally understand.
1) Cole (my son) loves to watch certain parts of a video over and over and over again for hours sometimes- just like a "stim". Can you tell me what he gets out of it? Is it to "organize" himself?
2) Were any of you non-verbal at this age? If any of you were non or "limited" verbals who eventually started language, can you tell me what it was that may have "triggered" you to start talking? Cole understands us perfectly (he's very, very smart and very bull-headed) and seemingly doesn't want to talk. We know this isn't true, but if he has a few words- why not more???
Thank you so much!
Courtland
A: Ok, I'll take these one at a time...
1) This is probably going to seem like a simplistic explanation, but it's probably just a really neat part of the video. I have a screensaver that I've had to take off my computer because it was just so much fun to watch that I never got any work done. Sometimes stimming is done to control stress, but other times it's just because it's really fun. The analogy I like to draw is to a bowl of ice cream. If you've had a really bad day and you're feeling upset, you might have a bowl of ice cream to cheer yourself up. But you also might just have one because they taste good and you felt like it.
2) As an Aspie, I've never really had verbal problems and I actually started to talk relatively early, but I do know what it's like to "not want to talk" when I'm stressed. Basically, it's like trying to talk with your mouth full of molasses. It's an incredible amount of effort to say anything, and it just doesn't seem worth the bother. Now, since my family and friends all know that I can talk, and trying to explain why I have trouble talking in, say, a crowded grocery store would be difficult and awkward, I usually make myself talk anyway. But I avoid it when I can and when I'm out shopping by myself I usually wear ear plugs and communicate with cashiers in writing. I want to reiterate that language is one of the areas in which Aspies and the classic Autism side of the spectrum tend to be different, and I can't guarentee that any of this is the same as what your son is feeling. It's just my personal experience.
One thing that I've found worked for me and that I've heard a lot of good things about from friends all over the spectrum is Sign Language. I can't explain why, but it just doesn't produce that same inertia feeling that spoken language does.
Wiley
